One fateful night, while on the brink of sleeping, twisted comfortably on a sofa chair, the inevitable happened. I was looking out a friend's window, trying to push myself off the cliff of sleep after a day filled with euphoria, when a sudden but relevant thought entered my mind. I knew, at one point or another, I had to ask myself that question, but I simply didn't expect it to come at such a mundane time.
Tao ba o feeling? I asked myself. It was my one measuring stick in gauging my affections for a certain person. If it's Tao, then this person is worth pursuing, because the mere essence of that person's being is the reason for all the butterflies I'm feeling in my stomach. If it's Feeling, then at once I know that whatever we have is fleeting and shallow, because all that person makes me do is be happy about the feeling I feel when we're together, and not the whole embodiment of the other being.
Of course this little "test," if you may call it that, is not mutually exclusive. Just because someone started out as a Feeling doesn't mean that she can't turn out to be a Tao after a while. But this measure is useful for me, because I know, hard as it may to find a Tao out there, I know I'm never gonna be comfortable settling for someone who's a Feeling. Sure, the kilig and the smiles and the happy crushes are fun, but I'm really not one to settle for anything that's short-term. And feelings, as we all know, are bound to dissipate. After the feelings have gone, what will remain? The Tao, on the other hand, no matter what feelings you feel for her, will always remain there, as a Tao. So long as she exists, the Tao in her will exist. No matter what Feeling you feel, no matter how many times it has changed, gone, and come back again, the Tao in her would never change.
Of course, the real challenge is not really in determining if a person is a Tao or a Feeling. Just spend a few days talking to that person and for sure, you'll know the answer right away. What's harder, though, is finding a Tao, because you'd have to sift through all the Feelings in order to find the Tao. And you know how hard tha can turn out to be.
So, this new "flame," you ask, is it a Tao or a Feeling? Definitely a Feeling. But, just as always, I'm not closing any doors. =)
Tao ba o feeling? I asked myself. It was my one measuring stick in gauging my affections for a certain person. If it's Tao, then this person is worth pursuing, because the mere essence of that person's being is the reason for all the butterflies I'm feeling in my stomach. If it's Feeling, then at once I know that whatever we have is fleeting and shallow, because all that person makes me do is be happy about the feeling I feel when we're together, and not the whole embodiment of the other being.
Of course this little "test," if you may call it that, is not mutually exclusive. Just because someone started out as a Feeling doesn't mean that she can't turn out to be a Tao after a while. But this measure is useful for me, because I know, hard as it may to find a Tao out there, I know I'm never gonna be comfortable settling for someone who's a Feeling. Sure, the kilig and the smiles and the happy crushes are fun, but I'm really not one to settle for anything that's short-term. And feelings, as we all know, are bound to dissipate. After the feelings have gone, what will remain? The Tao, on the other hand, no matter what feelings you feel for her, will always remain there, as a Tao. So long as she exists, the Tao in her will exist. No matter what Feeling you feel, no matter how many times it has changed, gone, and come back again, the Tao in her would never change.
Of course, the real challenge is not really in determining if a person is a Tao or a Feeling. Just spend a few days talking to that person and for sure, you'll know the answer right away. What's harder, though, is finding a Tao, because you'd have to sift through all the Feelings in order to find the Tao. And you know how hard tha can turn out to be.
So, this new "flame," you ask, is it a Tao or a Feeling? Definitely a Feeling. But, just as always, I'm not closing any doors. =)
enjoy the feeling. napagusapan na natin 'to sa damuhan and wala lang, kung ano man 'to, enjoy mo lang.
ReplyDeleteminsan masaya lang i-turn-off ang utak sandali, pumikit, kiligin, at maging masaya ng no holds barred. :D
taking things in isolation, masaya sya. Pero mamamatay na ang feeling pag nilagay lahat sa context. :P
ReplyDeleteKaya paki-take into consideration ang timeline ng buhay, keri. :P
hahaha. keri.
ReplyDeletesige, don't worry. kung anuman ang outcome nito, may solid pader of friendship and love sa tabi mo. Hahahaha.
Eto na yun: Bahala na. :D
Haha nakakatawa yung image, Elsie :p Parang... kakaiba yung binibigay na impression. Or ako lang yon. Hahahaha.
ReplyDeleteEto n atayo sa mga ganitong posts eh. Yikee. Hahahaha.:))
ReplyDeleteNako, surface level pa lang 'to no, Dan. Wala pa ring lelebel sa kaligayahang tinatamasa mo ngayon. CHOS! :))
ReplyDeleteI bet ikaw lang 'to, Mics. :p
ReplyDeleteHaha lagi naman diba ;p And btw, I haven't told you how much I love yung Chocolate Chips of the Heart! Hahaha. It's so JM. And it makes me smile everytime I read it :)
ReplyDeleteWe've Chico and Delamar's Morning Rush to thank for that. :P
ReplyDeleteAy ganun? K. Hahahahaha.:))
ReplyDeleteYun o, walang rebuttal! =))
ReplyDeleteang galing lang :)
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahaha.:))
ReplyDelete