Monday, January 26, 2009

If and If Only

If and If Only

If you were a ghost from my dark yesterday
If only yesterday's ghosts can be seen today

If you were a god watching over my life
If only a god can take away all strife

If you were a star sent to brighten the dark
If only the stars can send out a spark

If you were a dream that can never come true
If only my dreams are like fairy tales too

If you're a horizon that spreads through the sky
If only horizons paint anything but lies

If you were the wind brushing all through my face
If only the wind can take anyone's place

If you were a sweet angel sent right from above
If only the angels are capable of love

If you were a kiss, sweet, tender and mild
If only a kiss can make a man of a child

If you were a stranger wondering why I feel blue
If only all strangers can always get a clue

If you have not walked away from me that fast
If only I have found true love at last

You see, I wanted you to be everything you are to me
Bit I guess You And I were just not meant to be...

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Last night I couldn't sleep because I downed a full cup of coffee, aware that it would make my mind hyperactive and restrain me from sleeping.  But I did it anyway.  I don't know why.

And so at 3am I lay by my bed, cellphone in hand, thoughts running wild.  I texted several people to check who was awake, but obviously nobody's bloody awake at 3 in the morning.  So I browsed my cellphone instead, and I found this very beautiful poem.

Now I believe that people from the past can send messages to people from the future.  I wrote this poem more than three years ago and stored it in my phone.  And now I read it as if I have just written it yesterday.  It has completely spoken to me, like no piece of literature has before.  At my most desolate time, at the most depressing time of the day, I read this, and I was comforted.

Thank you, JM of three years ago.  I wonder where those wonderful rhymes have gone.  I find this poem very beautiful because the first lines (If's) are very hopeful but the counter lines (If only's) echoes total defeat and surrender.  Very much what I'm feeling right now.

Straight to the heart.

3 comments:

  1. the title reminds me of comsci. @_@

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  2. ****HUG****
    I like the JM now.
    I think he's a better person.
    But you be the judge nalang. :-)
    Kahit naman maging ano ka, labs ka pa rin namin. :-)

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  3. Friend, ang ganda. Yeah, the JM of 3 years ago knows exactly what to tell you... But I love you more today, than yesterday (or 3 years ago).

    Pero ah, this is starting to freak me out. HAHAHA. Talagang may MPD na ba kayo ni Els? HAHAHA. Taenah, lagi niyo dini-direct yung 'other self' niyo these days.HAHA!

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